my top 4 hospital visits in 2024
In honor of brumph’s post, I thought why not give my top hospital visits this year in jest?
4th spot: Visit of a big city hospital in November
Very pleasant, everyone was on time, it went over quick, the doctor took me seriously and I was able to get everything done and got diagnosed with what we had suspected. The navigation was confusing, but eventually I found where I needed to be. For it to rise up toward the top of my list, it should have been even more like a labyrinth, with a lot less signs, and I should have been made to wait for 4 hours like the authentic hospital experience.
3rd spot: Picking up the MRI images on a burnt CD at the local hospital
Only had to wait for a short while in the waiting area before picking it up. They did at least some things right: it was an outdated format none of my doctors could use on their PCs, with no analysis what they found, and I had to go there myself because their digital option to receive them was broken, which is why it gets the third spot.
2nd Spot: The MRI appointment at local hospital
This comes very close to the common hospital experience: General confusion for the receptionists upon my arrival if I really have an appointment or not, and them having to call upstairs. Them being extremely annoyed that I was there. In the waiting area, I was harassed and yelled at by an elderly woman for using my phone and wearing a mask. The MRI itself took what felt like 500 years. It is only topped by one other hospital performance.
1st place: The hospitalization in March
Entered the hospital via ambulance while I was passing out. The male EMTs seemed like they didn’t believe the bleeding was coming from the wrong hole, even though it was running like tap water. They got me there, then I waited for like an hour or so while blood pooled in my pants and guts. The emergency department didn’t have time for me losing consciousness because they had a staff meeting, and the other remaining ones had to record a podcast for the website. They took way too long to give me parenteral nutrition and a blood transfusion, despite my hemoglobin dropping down to 7. The food was trash, they almost gave me the wrong meds multiple times, and it was rare to see a doctor or nurse. They didn’t really care about Covid protocols with their two severe cases. They didn’t address half of the symptoms I had and all the testing they did to start me on immunosuppressive therapies had to be redone by my gastroenterologist because they half-assed it despite me being there for a week. The 80mg IV Prednisone also jumpstarted my period so I lost even more blood and continued to get worse after the blood transfusion. Had to share the room with 2 old snoring ladies and one vomited all the time. All in all, this is the most hospital-est hospital visit I ever had, and I was previously hospitalized for tonsil removal, a hernia, and a kidney infection years ago.
Published 19 Dec, 2024