what are my signs of success?
I recently asked myself that, and wanted to dig deeper.
I find the focus on numbers and status symbols in such answers extremely dull; doesn’t show a good character, but instead, a consumerist victim. If all you can think of in success is buying more poisonous murder machines and more extravagant but unnecessary housing that you may or may not hold hostage and rent out, you are a rotten loser and I wouldn’t even want to spend an hour in your gray and cynic mind.
My signs of success (meaning, things I can observe in life that show me that I “made it” because they are connected to privilege and some of the work I put in) that I hope to see one day are:
- Being competent and knowledgeable in the things I am passionate about.
This shows to me that I have had the energy, time, and whatever else needed to pursue my interests and kept learning. It’s easy to become discouraged and give up, refusing to learn and change. Stress and illness can interfere. Not succumbing to that and instead always persisting is a success.
I also never feel like I know enough about the things I love and feel like a huge impostor. Not feeling ‘less than’ anymore because I know I have a significant amount of experience and knowledge is something I see as a huge sign of success for me as I age and advance.
- Delivering reliably, and often overdelivering when it matters. Being happy with what I put out.
This sign shows that I love what I do, I feel well enough to do it, and I am appreciated, not trying to convince anyone or fight for approval; instead, going hard because I want to give back. To be happy with my output, it must be work that aligns with my values and that I am proud to contribute to, which is very privileged, as many can’t choose by morals or ethical concerns who to work for, but have to make ends meet somehow and play the card they were dealt.
- My reputation (positively) preceding me. Being top of mind for new projects if they fit my skillset.
Means: I don’t have to chase, I don’t have to run around reminding the people at work, or in the industry, that I exist; I can let my work speak for itself, and I shine by doing a good job, not by desperation or begging.
- Others asking me for advice.
Shows to me that I have a good track record, a good reputation, and am perceived as competent and someone to learn from.
- Not having to look at the price tag for everyday necessities. Being able to replace anything that breaks with ease.
I think middle-class people underestimate this sign of success. The way I grew up especially in my teens, we had to restrict grocery shopping, always take the cheapest, and hoped nothing breaks. Anything breaking could either not be replaced or set us back.
- Being able to financially support and maybe even spoil the people around me, and donating a lot more than I do now.
I think the financial aspect of success is wasted if it is only spent on me or who’s in my home. It’s supposed to be shared! I spent a lot of my life fighting alone, and there can be pride in not having had to rely on anyone for certain milestones; but I’m sure I will not make it far without the support of my loved ones, from strangers online too, and probably even influential books and works of art. It’s only fair and sensible to give back. I would much rather ensure everyone I know is comfortable before considering any luxurious purchase. Same with the fact that success means nothing if our planet goes to shit, animals go extinct, our water is poisoned, pandemics rage on and we’re being killed in extreme events. What is owning a Porsche for if all you can do is die in it?
- Work not interfering with my growth, my rest, my relationships and my health.
Not doing work that breaks my body, not having to work grueling hours for little pay, not having to work tons of overtime and be available almost 24/7 is a huge privilege. Flextime, unlimited sick days, a lot or unlimited vacation days, four hour work week and related work circumstances often due to union wins and protections all play into this. Bad work can wear you down, make you sick, unmotivated, and crushes your dreams, all while taking up the time needed to see friends and family. Having work that doesn’t is, to me, a sign of success in my life.
What’s difficult in writing these down and talking about success and privilege is that the two are linked somewhat, but usually not in the way people want them to be. They want to think that all privilege they see is earned success that they can replicate, but it’s not. There is a lot of privilege that is unearned and that you likely can’t recreate.
On the flip side, you can be really successful for your means in a really underprivileged position, but it’s not perceived that way because it is often about pure survival and not perceived as desirable or glamorous.
Just talking about success makes it seem as if hard work can get you anything, when that’s not true at all, but only talking about inherent privilege misses behaviors with which people increase theirs.
It’s extra complicated when acknowledging that people will likely not reach many markers of success, even of the ones I laid out, if the system we live in doesn’t value their work or skills, or doesn’t value them as a person. The last sign of success especially: Seeing how important the work of nurses and caregivers, sanitation workers, teachers and other childcare, farm and food industry workers, artists and more is, but how the circumstances of their work is making it highly exploitative and destructive due to how much that work has been devalued in society. Many negative aspects of their work are not inherent, they are a deliberate consequence of priorities and oppression.
It’s important to talk about the privilege and gratitude connected to not having to deal with these circumstances, while not also promoting the idea that working these jobs is below us or is not what a “successful” life is about. Ideally, these jobs too would allow for these signs of success. Just a sidenote!
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Published 03 Oct, 2025