social media dependency
It's been a tough time to be on social media recently, hasn't it?
I remember when I stopped using it one by one, starting from 2017, it felt dystopian to look on from the outside. While you're on it - and in it - it all feels so normal. It's something so many dedicate 4+ hours a day to; even when they say it's less, or if it feels less for them, that's often the actual true number. That's 28+ hours per week. The quick checks they think are just a few seconds are longer. The 3-4x a day they say they check are actually 12-15x due to to waiting at bus stops, the commute, downtimes at work, as a buffering time between activities, while on the toilet, before bed, and more, like some digital vape pen. It's scary to see that without tracking like ScreenTime, people don't even know how deep in they are.
And due to all time spent on there and almost everyone you meet being in on it too, I get the impression that it becomes this thing you just have to do, like paying taxes. You might not like any of it, but you just have to. Isn't it intense how services that are less than 20 years old have wormed themselves into our brains as so fundamental? They are a blip in human history. They're way younger than the average human's lifespan. And still, people act like they're going to die out here without being on the big socials. How did humanity manage before, then? You were likely alive at that time, too. I feel like I am talking to someone in a cult who is deeply brainwashed that they cannot make it without the cult and I should (re)join, too.
I understand and empathize with people who say they cannot leave due to this group, that organizer, this page, but I also think: You have a mouth and fingers. You can ask for it to be moved elsewhere, or that they offer a newsletter via e-mail instead, or anything else that might help lessen the dependency for you and others. It's not your fault that others have built something so essential for you on a volatile platform they don't control, but you don't have to stand by it and take it, either. You're likely not even the only one who wants to leave, but everyone keeps up this facade. You bringing it up could reveal a lot of others and be the final push off of the platform for this group or site you need.
There was a time before all this. People were able to organize and keep updated via other means. Facebook didn't invent your local hiking club, it can stand on its own or somewhere else perfectly fine. Why does it feel like I'm talking to someone in the later stages of a drug addiction whenever I talk to someone who has social media about their socials? It was supposed to be fun! Remember when you first started your accounts who-knows-when, it was unserious, it was fun, it was an optional pastime. If it's no longer fun and you even feel guilty using it now, hit the bricks! You mean to tell me you add value to that site by being a viewer of ads, offering content and data that is sold, that keeps others locked in and that is used to train AI, and then you don't even get anything fun out of it that couldn't be solved by an independent forum, Signal group or a newsletter? Wow.
You had a life before social media and you have a life after this. Plenty of people do not use social media anymore and they're fine. You can be one of them.
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Published 12 Jan, 2025